Couples vs. Friends with Benefits: Who Has More Sex?

You hear it from your single friends all the time: ”Having a girlfriend totally kills your sex life, dude!” But according to new research, your bachelor buddies are way off base.

People in traditional relationships not only have more sex than those in “friends with benefits” relationships, but they’re also more satisfied with their sex life and the person they’re shagging, says a recent study in the Journal of Sex Research.

Researchers surveyed 376 people—half in a traditional relationship, the other half in a friends with benefits scenario—about their sex lives: how much sex they had, how exclusive they were with their partners, how satisfied they were, their go-to sex acts, and more. The results: Although those who liked their flings without strings attached had more hookup buddies—an average of 6.37 lifetime partners, compared to 1.9 for the traditional group—people in relationships generally had a better time.

“Clearly there’s no right or wrong when it comes to what type of relationship you want to have,” says study author Justin Lehmiller, Ph.D., a social psychologist at Harvard University. But the results showed that those in committed relationships were happier and more satisfied, he says.

Another possible reason for the happiness boost: more commitment equals more communication. Lehmiller’s data showed that traditional couples were more open with each other when it came to discussing sex, including needs, boundaries, desires, and STI history.

Friends with benefits beat committed folks in one department, though: condom use. But that’s most likely due to sex buddies taking precautions against any unwanted complications, Lehmiller says.